Haim’s “Relationships” Is Our Reward for Surviving Another Winter

I can’t help but think of the Strokes and Haim as linked titans of 21st century pop-rock. In part because Haim may not exist as we know them without Strokes frontman Julian Casablancas, who enlisted Danielle Haim into his solo band—and also gave the sisterly trio their first big opening gigs—in the late 2000s. At that time, Casablancas offered the group some important advice: “Disappear, come back in a year with stronger songs, and hit the ground running.” They took those words of wisdom to heart, eventually releasing their bulletproof debut album, Days Are Gone, in 2013. By then, the Strokes were foundering creatively, having just released their third disappointing record in a row. In hindsight, it’s now clear that a torch was being passed. And let’s be real: The era when the Strokes were making consistently great music lasted about five years. At this point, Haim’s reign extends more than twice as long.

One reason the Strokes started recording increasingly aggravating songs had to do with their aversion to the groove. I’ve always considered their track “Under Control,” from 2003’s Room on Fire, to be a fulcrum moment: It’s their most convincing ode to R&B, a mix of classic Motown soul and NYC punk grit. What if they had continued to pursue that kind of in-the-pocket groove instead of chasing needling prog-rock nightmares, as Casablancas has done pretty much ever since with both the Strokes and the Voidz? Maybe Haim learned from their heroes’ mistakes, because over the past decade they’ve incorporated the slinkiness of R&B into their music more and more. That trend hits a new peak with “Relationships,” the first single from their upcoming fourth album.

There’s no guitar on “Relationships,” just a few easygoing piano chords, a wiggly bassline, and a hip-hop beat that continues in the pop&B tradition of Blondie’s “Rapture,” Mariah Carey’s “Fantasy,” and Solange’s “Losing You.” The song features production from the great Rostam Batmanglij, and brings me back to those halcyon Obama-era days when Batmanglij’s old band Vampire Weekend, Dirty Projectors, and Drake were experimenting with spare grooves of their own. (Fun, possibly relevant fact: Rostam released a gorgeous cover of the Strokes’ “Under Control” in 2020.) The breezy nostalgia is as blatant as it is welcome at a time when all those news notifications can’t seem to get worse—until, inevitably, they do.

Almost every song Haim have ever released has been about relationships—falling in love, losing it, and/or wanting it back—and “Relationships” takes on this tried-and-true pop theme with a sigh and a wink. Now that Danielle, Alana, and Este are in their mid-to-late 30s, they’re both looser and more mature. They know all the bullshit that comes with getting very close to another person, and they’re having some fun with that push-and-pull nonsense. “I think I’m in love, but I can’t stand fuckin’ relationships,” Danielle sings on the hook—a perfect pop lyric amid our current situationship era, with the casual F-bomb adding a here we go again edge. (Another fun, possibly relevant fact: Danielle’s ex, the producer Ariel Reichstadt, is listed as one of the song’s writers.)

But where most of Haim’s previous relationship songs felt intense, direct, and bone-deep, this one benefits from taking a step back and just laughing at the mistakes they’ve made in the past and are sure to make again. When Danielle offers some sage advice near the end—“So don’t let it bring you down/’Cause it all comes back around”—it’s the sound of Haim embracing their role as an entire generation’s big sisters: still having fun, still figuring it out, still letting the groove take them to where they need to be.